When Parents Disagree: Dr. Brad's TV Interview and Tips

Click on the video player to the left to watch Dr. Brad's TV interview. Click on the "Cool Kids Parenting Tips" icon above to open a Word document of these tips in English and Spanish to send to parents or link to this web page in e-mails and school web sites.

Get the Flash Player to see this player.

When Parents Disagree: Disagreement Do's and Don’ts, by Dr. Brad Schwall

Differences between parents in parenting styles and opinions causes conflict. Whether you disagree about how many sweets your kids should be allowed to have, bed-time time, whether your child should be allowed to have a cell phone, or curfew time – resolving conflicts can be difficult. What can parents do when compromise isn’t easy?

Keys to Positive Communication

Communicate your own thoughts and feelings.
Listen to each other rather than only thinking about what you are going to say.
Understand each other’s perspective – Who has the most involvement with the issue? What are the concerns?

Steps to Dealing with Disagreements

Define the problem – Focus on the problem rather than personality.
Define the goals – What do each of you want to happen?
Brainstorm solutions.

When You Can’t Agree

Compromise – Practice give and take.
Agree to disagree – Determine the issues that you can let go.

What Not to Do

Don’t bring up the past.
Don’t try to mind-read.
Don’t criticize.