How to Help Youth Handle the Pressure to Keep Up with the Possessions of Peers, by Dr. Brad Schwall

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The holidays can highlight the material things we want.  There is often a desire to keep up with the possessions of others or outdo others.   Some may experience feelings of inferiority if they don't have something someone else has.

Pre-teens and teens play and text on the latest smart phones or wear the latest fashions.  It's a natural part of development for pre-teens and teens to want to fit in by owning the latest gadgets and must-have fashion items.  This is pronounced during the holidays when we are focused on shopping and receiving gifts.  How can we help youth keep perspective on materialism and handle the pressure to keep up with peers?

Discuss and model the following principles:

• Gadgets have practical purposes and may be fun, but they are not the basis for fitting in.
• Recognize that others may show off their technology, but don't let the possessions of others make you feel inferior or behind-the-times.
• Be careful not to brag about what you have.
• Recognize the difference between wants and needs.
• Recognize that the joy in owning material possessions fades.  There is excitement about new things, but the excitement fades as they get scratches or we become accustomed to them or they go out of style.  It doesn't mean we can't enjoy new things, we just need to realize that things can't make us happy.
• Be aware of the power of advertising.  The purpose of advertising is to persuade us to get something and to change behavior. 
• Be aware of trends.  We may see others with the gadget or clothing item.   We see commercials. It appears that everyone has it.  This isn't true.