Teaching Children How to Be Good Friends, by Dr. Brad Schwall

Building Good Friendships by Age and Stage

2-4

• Before play-dates, give specific directions on how to behave.
• Provide supervision on play-dates.
• Show young children how to share and take turns.

5-7

• Take advantage of activities, such as sports and classes, to build and nurture friendships.
• Follow your child's lead.  Don't feel the need to push your child to do sleepovers.
• Affirm your child for positive qualities and interactions that lead to good friendships.
• Talk to your child about how to problem-solve and compromise.

8-10

• Talk about what it means to be a good friend.
• Be in tune with what is happening in your child's social life.
• Encourage your child to respect and show kindness to everyone.
• Encourage your child to have friends from a variety of groups.
• Brainstorm ways to connect with new friends.
• Guide your child to problem-solve when he or she faces challenges.

11-12

• Know your child's friends and their families.
• Talk about what your child looks for in a friend.
• Ensure that your child has at least one or two good friendships, but allow your child to determine whether he or she is interested in having a smaller group of friends or a larger circle of friends.
• Affirm loyalty and helpfulness in friendships.